A Homework Manual for Biblical Living Family and Marital Problems Homework Manual for Biblical Living Homework Manual for Biblical Living Homework Manual for Biblical Living

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Superb resource
This is one of yet another excellent resource from Wayne Mack. I have used it very profitably in counseling individuals in my congregation. Well worth spending time with this material and getting to know it. Profitable for personal spiritual growth as well.

Buy/More Info

Love Is Never Enough How Couples Can Overcome Misunderstandings Resolve Conflicts and Solve

With eloquence and accessibility, Dr. Aaron T. Beck analyzes the actual dialogue of troubled couples to illuminate the most common problems in marriage–the power of negative thinking, disillusionment, rigid rules and expectations, and miscommunication.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Excellent book!
I felt this book was insightful, consise, and most importantly helpful. The strategies in this book focus on automatic thoughts, your perception of your mate, and how to foster good communication. The tone of the book is very friendly and non confrontational.

If your relationship is in trouble, or you just want to improve your relationships, this is a good book to get.

5 Stars love is never enough is fabulous
This is a great book. I would and have recommended it to everyone I know. It is a great way to get people to think logically about things. Has been a big eye opener to my husband. Who won’t read it but will listen if I read out loud. Great Great book for the struggling marraige.

4 Stars review
Good book! Finding it very insightful and very “real” life! Makes for entertaining reading while learning.

4 Stars Great book, but some shortcomings…..
This is a great book on cognitve therapy as it applies to relationships. It is well-written, rigorous and illustrates important points with useful examples.

This book goes way beyond what you might see in a pop psychology book and the material is presented in a way that it can be applied. It also provides a useful framework for understanding cogntive therapy in general.

What I feel is missing from this approach is honoring basic compatability. While emotions are strongly linked to thought, there is more to making a relationship work than working through communication patterns and automatic thoughts.

A useful complimentary book is “Will Our Love Last” by Sam Hamburg. This book looks at the aspects of relationship having to do with compatability along three dimensions… chemistry, what he calls wavelength and practical everyday living. This approach provides an alternative lens to look at what is going on beyond the cognitive aspects of the couple’s situation.

4 Stars Review: Love is Never Enough
I purchased this book for a couple who were in need of some “3rd party” assistance to help them with communicating with each other. My understanding from the husband is that the information contained in the book has proved very helpful.

Buy/More Info

Longing for Daddy Healing from the Pain of an Absent or Emotionally Distant Father

Where Was Daddy When You Needed Him?

The absence of fathers is an epidemic plaguing our society, affecting families from every corner of our world and from all walks of life. Whether our fathers left us entirely during our childhood or were physically present but emotionally distant, those who missed out on an affirming, intimate father-love continue to experience the devastating consequences of that loss.

• Are you angry at the world and don’t know why?
• Do you inadvertently sabotage relationships or smother those closest to you?
• Do you rarely take risks or step out on faith?
• Is there an undercurrent of anxiety in most tasks you perform?
• Do you struggle to connect with God?
• Do you have little or no self-confidence–or minimal self-worth?

For women who answer yes to these questions, the common denominator is often an absent father. Far too many daughters have been stripped of a healthy relationship with their earthly dad. But real healing is within your reach.

Discover how the absence of your father has impacted your entire life–your attitude, your actions, your beliefs, your decisions, and your identity–and learn how you can stop resulting negative behaviors, beak free, and experience a confidence-building, empowering love that will heal your hurts and fulfill your deepest longings.

User Ratings and Reviews

1 Star Sad surprise
I dont have anything against religious books, but this one is written with a lack of reallity towards abset fatherhood.

I just got to read a few (awfull) pages, I wouldnt look for answers in this book.

4 Stars When you can’t change the past … all you can do is move forward
You can’t rewrite the past or cause your father to be anything other than he is. The only thing you can do is find a way to get the need met that was sorely lacking in your growing up. This book is very much written for those of a Christian perspective and concentrates on the relationship with God the father as a healing one. If you agree with the religious undertones, then this book can help you. I would also caution those who were emotionally scarred by an absent father to get psychological counselling from a licensed therapist trained in abandonment issues. Healing the spirit and the mind is critical and Robinson’s book is very strong on soul work.

Fathers matter and sadly not all girls get this benefit of an emotionally loving dad. No matter what the reasons for a father hunger …. there is hope and healing for those committed to turning it all around. You will never get back those years the way you want. You can only consciously learn the tools to cultivate the confidence in another way. Only you can heal you.

1 Star Simple…
This book is simplistic. If you already know in your heart that God is your Father and that He is who you need to look to when you miss your earthly dad, then you already know the theme of this book. If you know you need to forgive your dad for his sins against you in order to heal, then you have no need of this book. A pamphlet size would have covered the topic just fine.

As a student of psychology, I was surprised at Monique’s assumptions. One shocking example is on page 38 when she asks the reader to pray for God to erase the memories of your past. She says, “…erasing a memory is easy stuff for God.” I agree that God can do ANYTHING but He won’t always erase a memory. He can give us peace and strength to forgive but those painful memories our dad’s have given us all too often continue to linger despite those honest prayers.

In another example of faulty assumptions, she suggests that some dad’s are silently sorry for their sins and need forgiveness. Through forgiveness, reconciliation can be made and a new relationship can begin. This may be true in some cases but she doesn’t present the flipside. What if your dad ISN’T sorry? What if that relationship, despite MY forgiving, is never going to be restored the way I wish it could be? What if we have to deal with a painful, life long rejection if we confront our fathers about the pain? This is just one instance of many where Monique seems to have neglected looking at some painful realities. Even though I wish there was, there is no easy formula. I am surprised that someone with a degree in Biblical counseling can be this naive.

Overall, the book is very basic and overspiritualizes the issue. Like I mentioned earlier, if you already know God is your Healer and your Helper, you’ve already mastered the content of this book.

1 Star Longing for MY MONEY BACK !
I was expecting at least a little meat, and all that I got was some bones.

If you are Fundamentalist Christian, then you will be singing the praises! This is YOUR book!

If you are looking for intellectual discourse on the topic, forget it. This book will be a total waste of your time! This one does not deserve even a star.

I did learn a valuable lesson by ordering this book…READ the Amazon reviews BEFORE you buy!

I’m not Longing for Daddy, I’m longing for my MONEY BACK !

5 Stars Loved it and shared with others
I think that this book was great for me. God showed me that I was hurting because I didn’t know my father, and it was time to take some steps in the right direction to work through issues. I never thought that my anger, insecurities and more were impacted because of a lack of a father image in my life. I’m not blaming my father, but knowing that it wasn’t “just the way God created me” opened my eyes and allowed me to work with Him to correct the problem. I was so blessed I shared with another friend and she loved it too. I don’t think we realize how much our parents impact our lives, our beliefs, and so much more about us.

Buy/More Info

Saving Your Second Marriage Before It Starts

Using the same structure as Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott address the unique issues of “pre-remarital” families. This book prepares couples for what lies ahead and enables them to tackle the challenges with faith, perseverance, and hope.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Fantastic Tool to Really Know Your Intended Spouse
Wow! What a great book. Make sure you get the workbooks. Without them, you will miss out on the power of this book. Our church had a premarrital class that my boyfriend and I attended where we read this book. We met in high school and reunited 20 years later (2 years ago). There were so many questions I needed to ask him, but couldn’t find a way to bring them up in conversation. This book was a great spring board for those questions and more. We were able to get through the rough questions, the rough spots and learn we could trust each other talking about our past marriages, feeling about our kids, our doubts and our fears. I would recommend this book to anyone exploring the possibility of getting married. They have a CD that was great for the group instruction also.

5 Stars A Definite Read!
This is the best book out there for those wanting to learn from mistakes and do things differently next time! My fiance and I both agree we will keep it and remind ourselves of key points in the book. The experience of the authors comes through clearly and their advice is practical. We have already shared the book with family and friends. I wish someone had given me this book (or the one for first marriages) many years ago!

5 Stars Emotional Preparedness for second marriages
The perils and pitfalls of second marriages come with a lot of stress. Your happily ever after can be all that you hoped for if you are properly prepared. That’s why I wrote “Every Single Girl’s Guide To Her Future Husband’s Last Divorce”, to help second wives understand divorce, family law, and how to prevent financial stress. This book is the perfect companion to mine, offering a complete guide to emotional readiness and giving couples the tools they need to stay in love forever.

3 Stars Not bad
It’s not the most eye-opening, revolutionary book ever written, and not even the best book on the subject I’ve read lately, but it did have a few pearls of wisdom. I would recommend it to someone divorced or separated thinking about dating again.

4 Stars Helpful and Useful Before Remarrying
Several years after my divorce became final, I started dating a divorced guy. Long story short: we’re remarried and blending a family.

This book is one of three or four books about remarriage that I read before actually agreeing to get married again. It is helpful and useful; I found myself skipping around within the sections and not reading every word.

I’ve since found another book by these authors with almost the same title. I actually like the other book better. The title is the same, without “Second” in the language. I think the other book “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts” is actually stronger than this one.

Buy either one, with our without “Second” in the title. Both are helpful.

Lauren Hodge

Apple Valley, California

I also highly recommend this book:

Happily Remarried: Making Decisions Together * Blending Families Successfully * Building a Love That Will Last

Buy/More Info

A Model for Marriage Covenant Grace Empowerment And Intimacy

Jack and Judith Balswick bring together their years of teaching, writing and being married to coauthor this book. Their presentation is founded on the Christian doctrine of trinitarian relationships and draws on social science research. Rich in Christian insight, the Balswicks offer a vision of marriage that is both profoundly spiritual and thoroughly practical. For readers, pastors and counselors who want a book to deepen their vision in order to nourish and sustain the marriages of others.

Market/Audience

• Counselors and therapists
• Married couples
• Pastors
• Students and professors in the social sciences

Features and Benefits

• Written by a husband and wife team who have taught and written on this and related topics for years.
• Provides a model for the integration of social science into a profoundly Christian vision of God’s gift of marriage.
• Offers practical help for hurting or growing relationships that doesn’t dissolve the mystery of marriage into mere pragmatics.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars An excellent Christian approach to marriage
I have had the wonderful opportunity to study under both Jack and Judy at Fuller Theological Seminary. This work culminates their entire careers as educators and authors. This work offers their most significant theological work (based on Trinitarian Theology) for marriages. They stand firmly committed to their theological assumptions and interact fully and purposefully with sound and robust marriage and family models (namely Bowen Natural Systems Theory). They construct a model that honors both the theology and Bowen dimensions of their model. I highly recommend this work.

5 Stars A Distinctively Christian Model for Marriage
I highly recommend this book for engaged couples, married couples, and pastoral care workers. I also recommend it for textbook reading in colleges and seminaries. Jack and Judith Balswick pour their gifts, experiences, energy, wisdom, knowledge, and hearts into this accessible but rich work on married life. The Balswick’s are egalitarian in their view of marriage but that shouldn’t stop complementarians from reading this valuable resource. I enthusiastically recommend the book because of the thoughtful integration of social sciences, theology, and their own marital journey. I believe both egalitarians and complementarians will benefit from reading this monograph. Their vision of marriage being grounded in light of trinitarian relationships provides significant relational depth and differentiation from a uniquely Christian perspective.

Buy/More Info

Golden Anniversaries The Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage

As a candid glimpse into the lives of successfully married couples, this book provides a uniquely positive perspective on what makes marriages survive and thrive. What you learn from this wonderfully unique and powerful book is that you can save, improve or enhance your marriage if you listen to the advice of couples with 15,000 years of collective wisdom. Using poignant, real life stories to uncover the Seven Secrets for Successful Marriage, this book captures the essence of more than 25 years of interviews with successfully married couples in the U.S.A. and around the world. And you will love the results!

The central point of their research is that successful love and relationships are an accumulation of the little things. The little things matter! It isn t enough to just think about the little things or just talk about the little things. You have to just DO the little things every day! That’s what makes love and relationships last! If you understand and implement the simple ideas presented in this book, you will be well on your way to having a successful and long-lasting marriage.

You cannot learn or understand success by studying failure. That s a fact! Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz understood this notion more than 25 years ago when they began their research. By interviewing couples with successful marriages lasting from 30 to 60 years they learned a lot about successful marriage. They discovered the Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage by gathering data from hundreds of interviews with long-time happily married couples and their own extraordinarily successful 41-year marriage.

When you read their exceptional book you will understand that studying successful marriage is a prerequisite to understanding why most marriages succeed and some fail! This book gives you the power to make your marriage a success so you can celebrate your Golden Anniversaries together. Love well!

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars This book provides a framework for lifelong marital happiness!
Drs. Charles and Liz Schmitz have taken an entirely new perspective in understanding successful marriages. Rather than employing the approach most researchers use (studying failed relationships and trying to figure out what went wrong), Charles and Liz studied successful marriages (ones lasting at least 30 years) and what went right. Their research on over 15,000 years of successful marriages across cultures and continents provides a refreshing and uplifting perspective into one of society’s most valuable institutions. Their book provides a framework for lifelong marital happiness. It is written in a very easy to read style that has cute (and true) stories that will make you laugh and also bring a tear to your eye. This is the best book ever written on how to have a successful, happy and lifelong marriage. It should be given to every couple as a wedding present and made required reading before they take their vows.

5 Stars Truly a Golden read – recommended
As a leadership coach for executive women, I help my clients deal with marital stress almost as a matter of course. Communications and even basic courtesy can go out the window when partners feel threatened and/or overwhelmed at work and at home.

It is my pleasure to recommend this book, from two people who clearly practice what they preach and exemplify a relationship that is truly “golden”. With mesmerizing tale-telling skills the Schmitz’s take you through such an engaging wonderland of couples who have survived and thrived through stunning marital blows, you’ll find it difficult to put the book down. Therapists, take notice. You need this book in your waiting room and on your recommended reading list. Ditto for anyone male or female whose relationship is in trouble. Married or not, Golden Anniversaries will teach you the skills you need to live long and happily with yourself, and with your partner.

[....]

5 Stars We highly recommend this book!
We had the great pleasure of being interviewed by Charley and Liz for their book, Golden Anniversaries. It was our honor to share with them the ingredients of our own marital success based upon our 38-year marriage. As two very actively engaged professionals over the course of our marriage, we know that our own success is based upon an “accumulation of the little things” as Charley and Liz so often remind us. Mastering them was a prerequisite to our own marital happiness. We highly recommend their important book.

Dr. Thomas F. George, Chancellor, University of Missouri-St. Louis and Dr. Barbara Harbach, Professor of Music, University of Missouri-St. Louis

Review published with permission of Dr. George and Dr. Harbach

Buy/More Info

Boundaries in Marriage

This book helps you understand the friction points or serious hurts in your marriage–and move beyond them to the mutual care, respect, affirmation, and intimacy you both long for.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Great
As one who is currently struggling in marriage, attending therapy, attempting to learn my boundaries and have others respect them, this is an excellent book. I am also a Christian, and although I don’t crack open the bible to review each passage mentioned, it doesn’t bother me that they refer to it either.

5 Stars Enlightening, and a tremendous help
Its been slow going with this book, but that’s primarily due to the fact that I keep stopping to make notes, and reflect back on my own issues before reading ahead, something I’ve rarely done before. I’ve tried other self-help but usually speed read thru those without getting anything substantial from them – quite the opposite with this book.

For those who read the other reviews, you’ll see some references to the Bible and Christian teaching – I am a Christian (fairly new) but was not aware that this book had those references, so was happily surprised to find them. For those who have an open mind, don’t let a handful of bible verses sway you againt the book, especially when you realize that that it is basically common sense (i.e. Take the log out of your own eye before looking to remove the speck from someone eles’s – don’t judge cuz you probably have your own faults).

I found and continue to find the material especially helpful in my marriage. I can’t tell you how often the ‘common sense stuff’ here has been overlooked in our relationship. Moreso, this book has helped me uncover the underlying root causes to the issues we struggled with, while prior counseling barely scratched the surface. Addressing these has been a huge catalyst in making things better for my wife and I.

I’ve already recommended this to 2 friends of mine, and will continue to do so w/o being too pushy. But, as the old adage goes, you know what they say about opinions. Ultimately, is a $15 investment worth a better or more solid relationship..? sounds extreme, but i would have easliy paid 100X more if I knew it would get me to where we are today.

I’ve already ordered “Boundaries for Kids” and can’t wait to begin that one.

5 Stars Saved my marriage
My therapist recommended this book to me and it made a world of difference in my life. I was close to packing up and leaving. I read it from cover to cover and it put a lot of things into perspective. Then my husband picked it up. All of a sudden he was able to see life through my eyes and understood that being a breadwinner in the family was not his only role in the family. Although he was not cheating on me physically, he was cheating on me emotionally. We were able to stop hating each other for who we are not and loving each other for who we are. I am no longer looking for a way out. I am looking for ways to make us tronger.

5 Stars east to follow
This is a really good book. I also read the “Boundaries” book by both authors. It really helped me out with my issues of allowing others to take advantage of me. I was always giving but felt bad about how horribly I was being treated by the people who are close to me whom I gave to. Well, I took a stab at the Boundaries in Marriage book. What was most helpful to me was seeing samples of other couples in the book which is something I could relate to as well as the scriptures. I saw a review that said Boundaries are not allowing you to become one but in the book it says it allows you to take a look at yourself and change yourself because you cannot change anyone and keep your focus on Christ. Being focused on Christ in your marriage is hard when you are always thinking of how your spouse hurt you and what they did, believe me, I used to let those thoughts consume me. Sometimes people will keep running over you if there are never any consequences. Time and time again the Israelites sinned against God and were punished–they repented to God when they were in pain. Sometimes repeatedly hurtful behavior on both parties part has to be confronted with consequences (not revenge) so change can occur. The book has helped me, sometimes I have to refer back and be reminded because what is in the book is easy but sometimes in the heat of the moment harder to apply.

5 Stars Changing your mindset
I have suggested this book to many of my friends. Not because they have marital issues, but because its a wonderful book to change your thinking. One review said that creating boundries in your marriage cause division instead of creating “one flesh” as the bible says, however I disagree. I believe the boundaries that the authors are asking us to make enable a couple to experience one flesh more abundantly then before. The boundaries set in place are to cause more dependancy on Christ and less on your spouse or self. A more Christ centered life will cause healing in a relationship better then focusing on your spouse.

My husband and I picked this book up around valentines day for something for us to read together. We are all about learning as much as we can so that we can grow to the fullest as a couple. Being newly married we don’t really have any issues, but have really enjoyed this book and what it has to say. My main suggestion in reading this book is to focus on what you need to change not what your spouse needs to change. Our automatic reaction is to point out the other persons faults and needed areas of growth, but in order to really get what this book is saying you must focus on yourself and what God wants YOU to change. Try reading it together. It will help you focus on the areas you need to improve! Happy Reading!

Buy/More Info

When Two Become Three Nurturing Your Marriage After Baby Arrives

Raising children is one of life’s greatest joys, but the impact of introducing a child into a marriage is staggering. Many couples don’t realize the relational stress that parenting can cause. Most parents experience decreased intimacy and increased conflict. They may even find themselves asking, “Am I still in love?” When Two Become Three helps couples recognize the inevitable challenges to their relationship that occur during the childrearing years. It provides practical advice designed to help couples nurture their marital relationship in order to ensure it remains strong during this phase of life and beyond.

Buy/More Info

Separated By Duty United In Love

Addressing head-on the challenges of long-distance relationships with frank, practical advice and anecdotes, Separated by Duty, United in Love is perfect for military couples. It includes the answers and resources they need to meet the greatest challenge any relationship can face. With understanding born from over 20 years’ experience as a military wife, author Shellie Vandevoorde tackles the tough issues from dealing with the struggle of being a single parent to infidelity, real or imagined. As divorce rates rise in the armed forces (the divorce rate among officers in the US Army tripled from 2001 to 2004) Separated by Duty, United in Love provides a practical hands-on guide that can help couples in every branch of the service.

User Ratings and Reviews

4 Stars So Helpful!
As a new military wife, I didn’t know where to look, but when I picked this book up at the Post Exchange, I read it one sitting, an more than one occasion. Vandevoorde knows what shes talking about, from the perspective of someone who was IN the military, and from the perspective of a military wife, which is something not every woman can claim. I use many of her lessons in my life now, and always refer back to her text when I’m struggling with deployment and military wife in general. A must read for any military family.

5 Stars A Must-Read for every military spouse
Been in the military life for 15 years and found this book to be so helpful, especially during all these too-often deployments. The hardships faced by military spouses can only be understood by those who have been there. I read this book cover to cover, and even if I did know some stuff, there was a lot of helpful guidance and support. I wish I would have read it 5 years ago when the stress was all time high with my husband’s deployment to Iraq. (another 2 deployments followed) Time is valuable and we can hardly get through the day. Instead of searching through websites, this book has it all in one place here. And you can read in bed. It’s worth every penny. If I had a million dollars, I would give one to every military spouse. It’s a great resource — and we military wives deserve it for all that we have to go through.

5 Stars Exactly what you’re looking for!!!!
This book is an excellent and valuable resource for all military spouses and family members. Is easy to read and easy to understand. The fact that the author is a service member and is been married to a service member for so many years, gives us a clear-real view of what exactly we can expect and very important, she gives us advice in how to face, approach and successfully go through difficult times of separation caused by deployment. This book is exactly what you’re looking for!

5 Stars The most phenomenal deployment book!
I’m an army girlfriend. My boyfriend is deployed to Iraq for 15 months. I bought this book in hopes of finding a little comfort and advice for situations military couples come across. Instead, I found a book I couldn’t put down. The author did a wonderful job of taking life experiences from many different men and women, servicemembers and civilians and compiled them into a “crisis bible”. The issues addressed are real-life issues. There are no “beating around the bush” answers and she really tells you how it is but in a very motherly, experienced fashion. I found this book has given me so much more strength and a positive outlook on a situation many significant others could not put themselves in. I suggest it to anyone. Whether your special someone is in the military, you’re a parent, or even a friend. The advice is so real and helpful. My relationship has improved on both ends because of this book and the wonderful words of advice.

5 Stars Excellent book!!
Very insightful and full of useful information! Some areas are a little difficult to read when your husband is already deployed, but I got through it and I’m reading it again. I recommend this book to anyone seperated from your loved one for an extended period of time!

Buy/More Info

Pastoral Leadership for Manhood and Womanhood Foundations of the Family

As the shepherd of the flock, a pastor has many responsibilities–few as great as leading and training families. The pervasive attitude and beliefs of the world have only added stress and confusion to this task. Sixteen highly regarded men and women help bring clarity and guidance to this important issue. They tackle practical topics such as how and why to preach on biblical manhood and womanhood, putting the Internet to use, church discipline, small groups, and handling domestic violence. They discuss the personal applications within the pastor’s marriage, and they examine the biblical views of ministering to singles, homosexuality, leadership and submission, and much more. This compilation is thorough, potent, and a must-have for any pastor’s library.

User Ratings and Reviews

5 Stars Excellent practical help for busy pastors
I cannot imagine a more relavant book for busy pastors than this. There is condensed wisdom to be found here from those who have obviously wrestled with the many issues that face us these days. The editors asume that faithfulness to scripture regarding manhood and womanhood is itself ‘leadership’. For this approach many will be grateful. A variety of experienced contributors provide more tham discussion. They lead us to practical help in every area tackled. Many under sheperds will receive much guidance contained in these pages. This and the companion volume ‘Biblical Foundations for Manhood and Womanhood’ are both essential reading for church leaders today.

Buy/More Info