Toward A Growing Marriage Building the Love Relationship of your Dreams

November 29th, 2008 by admin

Toward A Growing Marriage Building the Love Relationship of your Dreams



Marital Bliss?’My wife is a nag!’ ‘My husband thinks I’m his slave!’We just don’t love each other anymore.’Common phrases in an all too common world of marital failure. We hear them everyday from our co-workers, our friends, and even ourselves. The separation and divorce rate among Christian couples continues to rise while thousands of other Christian couples continue to live together in something far less than the ‘abundant life’ that Jesus promised. Is your marriage turning out differently than you expected? Are all of today’s alarming statistics making you wary of ever getting married? Well you are not alone. In Toward a Growing Marriage, Dr. Chapman offers the hope you’ve been looking for. The author of the best-selling book The Five Love Languages, will help you get your marriage off to a good start or back on the right track with advice that is both biblical and practical. Part of the problem, according to Dr. Chapman, is that too many times our churches have focused on the negative biblical directives when teaching about marriage. We need to know more than to not marry a non-believer and to save sex for marriage. We need to know how to succeed. Toward a Growing Marriage is divided into two sections in order to help two different audiences succeed: those who are in the process of finding a spouse who will be a ‘fitting’ or ’suitable’ marriage partner those who have already said ‘I do’ and are trying to fulfill that commitmentMarital happiness is not automatic, but the practical application of Dr. Chapman’s helpful information will put couples well on their way to successful and fulfilling marriages.

User Ratings and Reviews

4 Stars Good tools for the married and unmarried
A great annoyance that I had with the beginning of this book was the concept of “ministry dating”, a Christian dating a non-Christian. Chapman points to 2 Corinthians 6:14 as a reason that marrying is not a good idea. He also said that there is a lack of commitment in a Christian/non-Christian relationship. Honestly, the whole thing could backfire and the “unsaved” may be very jaded toward religion if the relationship does not work out. Also, the Christian may be drawn into sin by the non-Christian, after all, sin loves company (see Genesis 3).

I still think that this book is worthy of a 4 star rating. There is a lot of practical advice with Biblical back-up. It has really caused me to re-think the role of a wife, but at the same time, it doesn’t say that the wife is inferior to the husband, she is his partner, his teammate.

The sections of the book that I think I learned the most from where the chapters on sex and money. Both have been perverted by modern day society. Chapman gives practical and Biblical advice in this area.

The chapter dealing with in-laws was very eye-opening. I never really considered “Honor thy father and thy mother” when thinking about in-laws. However, it does make sense that if you are talking bad about your MIL, you may cause your husband to dishonor his mother.

“Who Will Clean the Commode?” – I didn’t really give a lot of thought to the duties that each marriage partner would perform, whether it be cleaning the toilet, or paying the bills. I just thought that those things would work themselves out, and perhaps they might have. However, a much better solution would be to assign responsibilities before marriage so each partner knows what the other expects of them.

One of the great things about this book is that the “Growth Assignments” at the end of each chapter offer a section for the married and the unmarried. I thought this was very helpful.

The last chapter had a couple of annoying spelling errors (I am an editor, I pick up that kind of thing), but not so many that it makes the text difficult to read or understand.

5 Stars An excellent resource!
This book is great for couples who want to improve their marriage and even for singles who need direction on choosing a mate. The material helps couples learn better communication skills and work on problem solving and decision making. All of Chapman’s material is based on sound biblical teaching and is great for small groups!

5 Stars Discovering the True Heart through Communication
My husband and I have been married for 9 years and had to read this book for an assignment in our training at Rhema Bible Training Center. My husband began to read his book first and would constantly ask me “When are you going to read your book?” To be honest, at first I thought I did not need this book BUT NOW I wish I read it before discussing marriage. This book brings out issues that my husband and I after 6 yrs of dating and a year and a half engagement plus nine years of marriage have never thought to discuss. These vary issues were building blocks that formed an invisible wall we could not see each other over. We had valuable parts of our lives that were effecting us that we were not sharing with one another because we did not know quit what they were or even how to communicate them. I am so thankful for the open communication we gained through this valuable tool. We both kept telling each other, “If we had read this book before marriage we would have saved much heartache and frustration.” GLORY! The invisible wall is down and communication has entered such a more intimate and spiritually awakened level. This book is a MUST READ before even getting serious in dating! It helps you to look deep in yourself and see your heart and motives in a relationship as well as what you have to offer to someone else. Before getting engaged, I believe to be 100% effective both people should read and do the assignments in the book. BUT if like my husband and I you did not read this book and had limited communication THIS BOOK is the tool you need to help open you both to a new level of understanding and relating to one another. This book was our highway to a path we had never traveled with one another. I am very thankful this book is available and pray that everyone learns from it. A Happy Healthy relationship is worth everything you put in to it! This book is worth reviewing every 6 months and is fast and easy understanding with wonderful Assignments to encourage open two way bridge of communication that leads you both on the same path to a Loving Relationship of your dreams! Be blessed and encouraged. This book is a gentle tool to open doors to rooms and closets that you did not even know you housed. What a wonderful way to explore your own heart and motives as well as discuss those of your love one.

4 Stars Great read for married or engaged couples
My wife and I read this book before we got married. It explains how to use Christian principals to relate to marital issues. How to always approach your mate in charity and always resolve situations in the spirit of love and not anger. It gives accounts of how this philosophy has played a role in many marraiges.

While this book is good,we enjoyed Dr. Chapman’s other book, The Five Love Languages much better.

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