Each person is mainly a product of his family. The family has created him not only physically, but his character and his personality as well. Although wholesome development requires that he become separate and independent from his parents, stand on his own feet and assume control of his own life, he is still largely what his family has made him. The family is not only the factory in which each of us was built. In some respects it is the material out of which we were constructed.

Therefore one of the best ways to know a person is to know his family. Someone has said, “The best way to pick a wife is to find a happy family and marry any one of the daughters.” So extreme a statement requires qualifications. But even taken literally it would result in a higher degree of success than the methods of choice now usually employed. Here are some further questions you should both ask about each other.

Were your own parents happily married?

Your own home background happy?

In most of the studies which have been made so far, a happy home background stands out as one of the most important essentials for marital success. As Professor Nimkoff says,1 “Happiness begets happiness. It appears that those who are brought up in a happy home come to expect happiness and act in ways which produce it; they have the habits that make for happiness.”

The Burgess and Cottrell study found that when both parties to a marriage come from very happy homes, their chances of making a good adjustment are more than twice as good as when both have come from average or unhappy families. These statistics carry both a warning and a hope. Over ten percent of those from happy homes made poor adjustments, and nearly three-tenths of those from homes not particularly happy made good adjustments. A happy home background does not guarantee success nor does an unhappy home background foredoom you to failure.

If either or both of you come from unhappy home backgrounds, it means, not that you should refrain from marriage, but that you should exercise greater care, and work harder to make your marriage a success.

An important part of the question concerns the happiness of your own childhood. A commonly accepted myth makes childhood the happy period of life. Careful research and clinical experience has shown that the opposite is often true. Many childhoods have been periods of violently resented oppressions and terrifying fears. We know that the basis for personality is laid during the early years. Therefore the happiness of your childhood is one important indication of your chances for success in marriage. Here, again, you are not guaranteed or necessarily doomed. But it is a matter to which you should give most careful consideration.

More resources for home and family:

Get an ice cream maker
Wine racks for sale
Information about the paleo diet
Wine Fridge for home use
Start you party with a fondue pot
Resources for buying bakery equipment
Make dinner fast with easy chicken recipes
Find the answer to the question “do i qualify for o loan modification“
Locate conveyancing solicitors
Find information about industrial property

Technorati Tags: family relationships

Marriage Counseling Tips
By Ken Marlborough

A number of marriage counseling tips are available for strengthening marriage relationships. Experienced marriage counselors suggest these as a means of improving your relation with spouse. Marriage counseling tips are pieces of practical wisdom that come in handy to save your marriage.

Lack of communication is the main problem behind most family conflicts. Sometimes your spouse reacts violently and shouts at you. A useful tip in this situation is this – don’t get over-emotional or raise your sound when talking to your spouse. Lowering your voice is the best way to decrease anger. It is a good idea to write a letter or e-mail to your spouse mentioning your questions, requests, and feelings. People who refuse to talk sometimes reply to a letter. You can send your spouse a favorite chocolate or other preferred item along with the letter. Another tip is to make a list of things that should be solved immediately. Check whether your spouse has the same opinion or not. Another constructive marriage counseling tip to save your marriage is – spend more time with your spouse and remember all the fun and enjoyment you had together.

Another useful tip is to look for something to arouse the interest of your spouse. You offer to take the children to a picnic so that your spouse can enjoy some private time to relax or to entertain friends. Yet another tip is to buy a beautiful greeting card and write a note asking if you can find a private time to talk to the spouse. People often have an easier time talking in a restaurant over dinner, because they won’t yell and fight, but rather, will simply talk.

Other useful marriage tips are to show respect for each other at all times, discuss important issues together, and share responsibilities. Marriage counseling tips available abundantly on Web sites. Marriage Counseling provides detailed information on Marriage Counseling, Christian Marriage Counseling, Family Marriage Counseling, Free Marriage Counseling and more. Marriage Counseling is affiliated with Marriage Problems.

More resources for home and family:

public marriage records
signs hes married
Web Design Tucson
Carpet Cleaning Melbourne
plasterers sheffield
Miami Plumber
codice promozione Fastweb
sokemotoroptimalisering

Technorati Tags: counseling tips